awards night
living for a greater recognition
“Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven. “Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.”
After divorce, many women find themselves motivated by new reasons for success. Whether rebuilding careers, proving independence, or providing for children alone, our motivations for achievement can become complicated—and sometimes unhealthy.
During my 35+ years in sales, I've experienced various motivations for success, many of them unhealthy. As a divorced single mother, I was entirely driven by fear—fear of losing my job, embarrassing my sons, or giving my ex-husband ammunition against me. I tolerated toxic bosses rather than trusting God, putting up with situations that caused emotional, mental, and physical illness.
For women rebuilding after divorce, success often becomes intertwined with proving our worth to family, friends, colleagues, and even our former spouses. We may seek recognition to validate that we can thrive independently, but this can divert us from God-centered motivations.
photo by Aaron Burden @aaronburden
Through years of experience and God's patient teaching, I've learned essential truths about pursuing success with the right heart:
Here are Seven Principles for God-Centered Success After Divorce
1. Check Your Motivation If your drive for success conflicts with God's word or stems from selfish ambition, don't expect His blessing. Success built on revenge, pride, or proving others wrong isn't a blessing from God.
2. Embrace God-Given Desires There's nothing wrong with recognition and the desire to succeed—God gave us those desires. Just remember, no one succeeds in a vacuum. Don't forget to thank God and others who helped you rebuild after your divorce.
3. Recognize God's Provision. Your success is often God's provision for you and your family during this season. Don't let arrogance overcome your spirit and forget who truly provides for you.
4. Work for God's Approval Don't do anything solely for others' recognition. Do everything to please God, who likely gave you the skills and desires in the first place.
5. Stay Humble in Victory When recognized for success, remain humble. Don't brag, especially to those you beat out—including your ex-spouse or former colleagues who doubted you.
6. Reject Fear-Based Motivation Don't be driven by fear. That's not from God and often signals you're striving toward the wrong goal or for the wrong reasons. Trust God's provision instead of operating from a place of scarcity.
7. Remember How You Handle Both Success and Failure. How you lose speaks louder than how you win. Your children and others are watching how you handle both triumphs and setbacks.
"Be wise enough to appreciate your past and recognize it isn't a part of your future." ~LovetoKnow
photo by Anthony Tran @anthonytran
For divorced women rebuilding their lives, earthly rewards feel good but are temporary. Saturday morning always comes after Friday night's celebration. If we're not living for greater recognition than worldly success, facing each new day becomes much harder.
Everyone wins when we work as if working for God. Whether we receive awards, public recognition, or not, our valid reward comes from the One who sees our hearts, our struggles, and our faithful efforts to rebuild with integrity.
Remember: Your worth isn't determined by your ex-husband's opinion, your colleagues' recognition, or society's standards. Work for the applause of heaven—it's the only recognition that truly lasts.
